A Sunny Day

Well I continue to struggle but I focus on the fact that it is less than a week until I see my doctor and that it's almost June and it's a beautiful sunny day (albeit a smoggy one). I know I have had some set backs, but I've had some successes too. My clothes are loose, I can shop at regular stores, I can walk up a flight of steps without getting winded and on and on........ I think I'll look into once again joining a gym. I will maintain a positive and healthy attitude (really, I will).

Update

I haven't posted in a while. I've been very frustrated and scared because I have no restriction, I am eating too much and have been completely unable to keep any kind of motivation or will power on my own. I go back to the doctor a week from Wednesday but I feel like I'm just treading water. I know I should continue to embrace what I have already accomplished, but it hasn't been easy.

Frustrated

I haven't posted in a while. Mainly because I am very frustrated with how things are going. I went in for an unfill and of course as I knew would happen, I now have no restriction. I am eating more than I should and getting panicked about re-gaining my weight, which of course starts the cycle of discouragement all over again. On top of all that, I can't get in to see my doctor until 5/27.  I didn't make my Shrinko de Mayo goal of 185(188) and it's going to be a verrrrrrrry long month. 

An Awful Week

OMG sometimes I hate my band.  This is the second time that I have gone in for a fill and done awesome during liquids and mushies phase.  Been excited that I finally have restriction and just know that I have found my "sweet spot" and all will be right with the world. Then....as soon as I get to the solid food stage, I end up eating something that gets "stuck". Which starts a whirlwind of throwing up and swelling and ultimately getting to the point where I can't even keep water down. This time I waited it out, but after two days of not being able to keep water down and starting to get headaches from being so hungry, I had to go back in for an un-fill a second time.  I am now down to 5.8 cc's.  At one point I was at 7.  I just know it's not enough, but I was so miserable before.  I want to have good restriction and lose weight slow and steadily, but no so bad that I will tolerate the pain and there is no way I can ride out the swelling and not eat or drink for several days in a row.  I am happy with my current weight loss and accept that I will have to rely on more willpower and less band. At some point however, this band has GOT to meet me halfway.

Rude Awakening

Well if I've finally reached full restriction than what have I been doing for the past 7 months.  I have read on blog after blog about how I need to take small bites, chew, chew, chew and that I wouldn't be able to consume more than about two ounces at a time.  I heard about it but never felt it.  Well now I do.  It has been a rude awakening.  OMG, I know I'm not too tight because I can keep liquids and soft proteins down, but man if I don't chew slowly then I am hating life.  On the other hand, I am down another 7 pounds. So it will take some adjustment and re-learning but I can take it.  I feel so great and so healthy that I will survive this challenge.

A good Weekend

Well I had a great weekend camping (or rather cabining) with friends and visiting with our old friends Paul and Linda Jones. We stayed at the Boy Scout Camp in Holcomb Valley where Paul is the in resident park ranger.  Ed did all the cooking and I feel like I have finally reached my sweet spot. I was able to eat a bit of food, feel full and no hunger in between meals. As a matter of fact, getting food down at all on some days was very hard and other days went well.  I do believe I may be back on track.  I know I still have to do my part, but hopefully I won't be hungry between meals and things will be easier now.  

A fill and hopefully a new start

Well I finally got in to see my Doctor and he gave me a fill. Basically he added what had been taken out when I got sick last time. He didn't have me drink water while he did the fill like he usually does so I don't know if it will be enough. I'm hoping it will be enough.  Something needs to change as I am getting very frustrated with not being able to figure this band out. I am very happy with my overall progress but it has been a lot harder than I thought it would be. Regardless, I have lasted longer and lost more than I ever did before and that includes the time I was taking Phen-Fen.  So on the one hand I am happy and on the other very scared about re-gaining my weight. Each day is a new day.